Hi Reader!

I’ve raised two kids with ADHD, and if there’s one thing that experience has taught me, it’s that ADHD doesn’t have one particular “look.”

My son’s ADHD has been much easier to recognize from the outside. Hyperactivity. Impulsivity. The kinds of things people often picture when they hear ADHD.

My daughter presents very differently.

Having two kids whose struggles can look so different has made me really interested in understanding what ADHD actually is, not just the behaviors we tend to associate with it.

Because there are still so many misconceptions about ADHD.

One I hear often is:

“But everyone does that sometimes.”

“I forget things too.”

“Everyone gets distracted.”

“Don’t we all procrastinate?”

And technically…yes.

We all lose our keys. We all have days when we can’t focus. We all put off things we don’t want to do.

So what makes ADHD different?

It isn’t the presence of one particular behavior.

It’s the pattern of challenges, how persistent they are, and how much they interfere with everyday functioning.

A child with ADHD may repeatedly struggle to direct their attention where it needs to go, even when they know something is important.

They may know exactly what they’re supposed to do…and still have trouble getting started.

They may remember something one day and completely lose track of it the next.

They may be incredibly focused on one activity and seemingly unable to focus on another.

That inconsistency is part of what makes ADHD so confusing.

From the outside, it can look like:

They can do it when they want to.

And that can quickly become:

So they must not be trying.

But ADHD is much more complicated than effort.

Over the next few emails, I want to unpack some of the things I’ve learned about ADHD, not only as someone who works with families, but as a mom who has spent years trying to understand what my own kids needed.

Because the more I understood what was underneath the behavior, the more it changed the way I responded to it.

If you are raising someone with ADHD or wondering if you are, I hope these emails will encourage you and help you feel less alone in the journey.

Your Friend,

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